Do you ever have one of those phases in your life where people from your past just blindside you and you're completely taken aback?
I have. It's happened twice in the span of only a few months. And I'm troubled by it.
The first time it happened, well, whoever reads this knows how well that turned out. I kicked that person out forever, at least I'm certain I did this time. Today, a new contender entered the ring. All I will say is this person and I had a horrific falling out. Biting words were exchanged, there was the battle of the wills, some sleepless nights. We haven't really spoken in...a couple years now. Until today, that is.
I'm uncertain how to proceed. I am pleased and relieved that this person doesn't hate my guts. I was quite frankly very surprised they still even wanted to talk to me. It was really nice, just being human to each other again. Though...I am perturbed, nay, perhaps even afraid of letting this person back in. This person has expectations that I'm not sure I can guarantee in the long run. I don't know how to say that all I want is to be just friends, no more and no less. If I were to let them back in, the very best they could hope for is just friendship.
Maybe...maybe I just shouldn't...just shouldn't at all. This is just asking for trouble. No good is going to come out of this. But...I can't be the heartless villain. Not again. I dunno if I have the heart to crush this reconciliation before it even begins fully. But at the same time, it's not fair to me, but more importantly it's not fair to Mishka, not in the slightest. I don't want to even entertain the most minuscule notion of wrecking the fantastical thing I have. Not ever. Not over something like this especially, it'd be just shameful.
I have. It's happened twice in the span of only a few months. And I'm troubled by it.
The first time it happened, well, whoever reads this knows how well that turned out. I kicked that person out forever, at least I'm certain I did this time. Today, a new contender entered the ring. All I will say is this person and I had a horrific falling out. Biting words were exchanged, there was the battle of the wills, some sleepless nights. We haven't really spoken in...a couple years now. Until today, that is.
I'm uncertain how to proceed. I am pleased and relieved that this person doesn't hate my guts. I was quite frankly very surprised they still even wanted to talk to me. It was really nice, just being human to each other again. Though...I am perturbed, nay, perhaps even afraid of letting this person back in. This person has expectations that I'm not sure I can guarantee in the long run. I don't know how to say that all I want is to be just friends, no more and no less. If I were to let them back in, the very best they could hope for is just friendship.
Maybe...maybe I just shouldn't...just shouldn't at all. This is just asking for trouble. No good is going to come out of this. But...I can't be the heartless villain. Not again. I dunno if I have the heart to crush this reconciliation before it even begins fully. But at the same time, it's not fair to me, but more importantly it's not fair to Mishka, not in the slightest. I don't want to even entertain the most minuscule notion of wrecking the fantastical thing I have. Not ever. Not over something like this especially, it'd be just shameful.
Damned if I care, damned if I don't....
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